Things That Can Happen In School

So before I continue with the story about my deconversion process, let’s make one stop at 6^th grade and the perils of being a kid 45 years ago in a system that was not prepared to deal with issues like the one that follows.

I was not the most self-assured child in the Simi Valley school system, and was susceptible to any attention given by adults and teachers. There were, of course, many children like me in grade school, and even higher grades. When the teacher from next door (to the class I was in) decided to give me that much wanted attention I was ready to take it. I was invited to come into his class after school and clean the chalk board, as well as help with other small tasks. This made me feel great. Here was someone who knew I could help out and gave me a chance to do so. But the motive for this request for my help was  not as innocent as I would have hoped it would be.

During one of those sessions where I had finished the board cleaning, the teacher invited me over and had me sit on his lap. There was no reason not to do so, so I climbed onto his lap and we talked. He was thanking me for my help and had his arm around my shoulder so I wouldn’t slip off his lap, and while we talked, his free hand took a restful position on my right thigh. As he talked he gave it a fatherly pat. Then a somewhat less fatherly squeeze, and then the hand drifted to my crotch where there was even less fatherly attention. (And here, I am using the term “fatherly” as in a child/parent relationship and not as in a Catholic “father” priest. That’s a whole ‘nother can-o-worms).

I was uncomfortable, but I know that this happened at least one or two more times, because it was easy enough to suggest to myself that what happened was not intentional. Back in those days, no one, and I mean NO ONE, talked about child molestation in polite company. Hell, they didn’t even talk about it in impolite company. I was probably 12 or 13 when this happened, and I didn’t know what was going on. Needless to say, I did stop going to his class, and the memory would only occasionally crop up, though it did so often enough over the years to stay well planted in my mind.

Many years later, while visiting my parents place, I was reading the local paper, and there was the story of a teacher who had been arrested and was on trial for following a 10 year old girl into the bathroom and fondling her. My exclamation of “Ha, They caught the son-of-a-bitch” surprised the people in the room (family all) as did the story that follow with my explanation of why I was glad they had done so. Now to the best of my recollection, this incident didn’t ruin my life. There may have been some things going on that I was unaware of, and maybe still am, but I really didn’t focus on this. Still, it was there in my memory, and is one of the events in my life that I have clear and visceral reactions too.

This kind of thing happened all the time, to a lot more people than we ever let on, and it still does. First, please get it out of your head if it is in there that this was a gay teacher. He wasn’t. He was a pedophile, and this child molester liked little boys and little girls; an equal opportunity bloke. Second, don’t think that this is no longer a problem. This happens all the time, and though we are better at prepping our children for this kind of thing, we must still keep our eyes and ears open for this kind of off kilter behavior. We are all too willing to give the benefit of the doubt to a trusted adult, and I get that, but less so where our children are involved, please. Just something to think about. This PSA is now over.

From Christian to Atheist (Part Two)

A Transitional Period.

In my last year in elementary school (6^th grade) we were given the assignment of doing a book report presentation. At this point in my life, I was not much of a reader yet. I had struggled with reading (and spelling) from day one, and was unaware of what dyslexia was. Still, I had been given an assignment, and so looked for a book that interested me. What I found was a book on hypnosis. I’ve no clue where I found this book, though it is possible that my mother had it, or that it came from the library.

What a concept; the control of another’s actions and thoughts, in the hands of a twelve year old boy. I’ll bet the author hadn’t thought that one through. I read the book and wrote out my report, but this was a book on hypnosis, and screamed to be performed before the class, not merely talked about. I got a friend (I think her name was Jackie) to be my subject and practiced a few times on her before the day of the book report presentation. She was a natural subject and by the time I presented my report could be put under very fast .

She was subjected to the usual “tricks” of the hypnotic art (at least as performed by a 6^th grader) including lack of feelings from pinching, and arms that couldn’t be lowered or raised except on command. Thanks to her being perfect for the job, and my having learned the rules for putting someone under, I aced the book report and the presentation.

This was also the start of another part of my journey from Christian to atheist. This book report was my first real step into the area of the workings of the mind, and the fringe studies of ESP, ghosts, magic (as in “real” magic), UFOs , and in general, “things that go bump in the night.” I started to discover that all these things were being talked about and, from what I could tell, they were the subject of real investigations. And I had, after all, experienced the “power” of mind control over another person, so there may just be something to these many claims. Thus began my foray into the world of the paranormal.

This also coincided with a shift on the religion front. I don’t know why or what caused this, but my dad had decided to leave the Southern Baptist Church. This didn’t bother me much, and we spent many a Sunday visiting churches all over the valley, until we came upon The Shepherd of the Valley (United Church of Christ). This was big in my development because this was not a highly dogmatic congregation. That’s not to say there weren’t a few folk who were more or less literalist, or perhaps conservative in their beliefs, but not anything like the Baptists. It was very freeing, and without the dogma to demand my acceptance of much of the Bible claims, they were going to suffer. One of the reasons why was that I was starting to question the Bible stories, and this would not have been easy in a more conservative environment.

So along with moving to a more liberal church, hypnosis was one of the catalysts to my questioning ways, and if I had known what atheism was back then, this might have been a shorter story, but that word was still not in my vocabulary. Nope, I still had a ways to go before I got there. I had, after all, discovered the paranormal. I suspect even atheism wouldn’t have stood a ghost of a chance, until I got that out of my system.

From Christian to Atheist (Part One)

When I was about 11 years old, I sat in the pews one fine Sunday, as most Sundays are in Southern California, and listened to the sermon given by the preacher at our local Southern Baptist Church. I’ll be honest and say that I don’t remember the details of the sermon, except that it was on evolution and the Biblical creation story, and how the Biblical story wins. It was about Adam and Eve (one bit I do remember) and various other elements of the war being fought by Bible literalists and non-literalists (and non-Christians). I do remember being shocked at what an idiot the preacher was, really and honestly shocked that anyone could be so ignorant. When we got home and were walking up the path to our front door, I made a remark about it within the hearing of my parents. Being a thoughtful and intelligent child at that age, I may well have used the word stupid to describe the preacher and his views. This did not go over well with my dad, who immediately scolded me for my choice of words, though I don’t think he followed through on any opinion of the sermon itself.

I’m not sure why that memory sticks with me when so many others do not, but it is clear to me, with my pre-teen/early teen focus on science, the space program, and dinosaurs, I had already seen the light shone by the scientific method. And sure enough, that light would come back to bite me on the butt many times in the future. In many ways, I am a believer, or at least, I want to believe. I remember that somewhere near this time, I decided to take that long walk down the aisle one Sunday morning and “accept Jesus as my Personal Savior.” Several of my friends had done the same thing, and I suspect that my young mind objected to not being included in that special club. I remember being very uncomfortable about changing in the room before and after the baptism (so much for Jesus being first on my mind), what with the preacher being there too. The result was sitting through the rest of the service (what there was of it) with wet underwear. Everyone seemed awfully excited and happy for me, but I don’t remember being or feeling any different.

So I was certainly willing to have the stories I had heard in Sunday School be real, but there were limitations. Adam and Eve, the talking snake, the Garden of Eden, and many of the other tales were rather hard for me to take in whole without choking. The blood baths ordered by God seemed easier to believe, and most of the non-miraculous entries had that ring of truth given the state of humans and civilizations back in Biblical days. Heck, we had just been through the Cuban missile crisis, and JFK had been shot, and I could watch WWII movies and T.V shows almost every night, so a bunch of wars fought for God seemed within the realm of reason. Clearly, as a believer, I had a ways to go, but Jesus seemed like a sure thing. Everyone I knew believed in Jesus; that had to count for something, and I didn’t even know that not believing in God (or gods) was an option.

Of course, there was nowhere near this level of analysis done by me at eleven. The stories of Old Testament miracles seemed unlikely and had that fairy tale quality, while the New Testament Jesus stories were miracles of a more manageable level, and seemed more personal. All that said, I still had my doubts, and the notion of a God watching over me 24/7 was a little eerie, at least when I thought of it. So to sum up, I believed in God, Jesus and had no idea what the Holy Ghost was supposed to do, was shaky in my belief of the larger O.T. miracles and more accepting of the more personal miracles including those that were done to help the Hebrews/Jews/Israelites get what they were promised.

Who knew that in only a few short years, I would begin to question everything I had been taught and begin my path to freedom from Christianity and religion?

Trying again.

We are about to start a new year, and I am going to try blogging again. I am attending college (at 58 yrs) and am at break, so this may be the best time. Around February I will be attending classes again, so we’ll see what happens then.

I think my goal is to write short essays. Mostly about atheism and religion, or maybe I’ll be a bit broader about subject matter. We’ll see. In the meantime, I hope you all have a happy New Year celebration and a good year ahead.

Creationist Christians

Kirk Cameron and Ray Comfort have made a video talking about the program they are promoting, where by they will give away 100,000 copies of “The Origin of Species”, by Charles Darwin. They will be doing this on collage campuses across the country on November 19 (Thursday) to “celebrate” the 150th anniversary of the publishing of Darwin's book.. To get out their Christian message of creationism Ray Comfort has put a 50 page forward in the book that tells the “truth” about Darwin and evolution.

I'm not going to address the nonsense in his forward in this post. There are more than a few blogs that have put the lie to Mr. Comforts fantasy attack on atheism, Darwin and evolution. I want to put some of the comments of his and Cameron's fellow Christians out there. But before doing that, I will point out that not all Christians are like Comfort or Cameron, or like the people whose comments I will address here. I understand that many Christians accept evolution, and are not like the right wing nuts that are in charge of the GOP.

Read the comment on TMZ, and please feel free to watch to Cameron's video.

Kate says:

“[Cameron is] saying he wants two perspectives given in the classroom. Why does that scare evolutionists so badly?...You may be wrong. Do you want to be wrong? I don't.”

The classroom Kate is referring to is the science classroom, where evolution is taught. Cameron and Comfort both want creationism taught side by side with real science, but creationism is not science. It's religion. Evolutionists are not scared, they are tired of the lies, misinformation and constant politicizing of science.

Scientists do get it wrong sometimes, maybe a lot more than they, as individuals would like, but that's what happens, when you have to test out your ideas in the real world. And just in case Kate is really talking about being wrong about gods, how typical that she is so sure she is betting on the right horse.

Francie says:

“...Darwin's "theory" doesn't have an evolutionary leg to stand on. If subjected to today's modern scientific and biological knowledge his "theory" would be instantly debunked and revealed for what it is, some delusional attempt to discredit the Creator of the universe who has eternity in his hands. It's your choice where to spend it.”

Francie is funny. Ask 99.9% of modern biologists and other scientists and they will tell you that evolution theory is the basis of modern biology. Really, does she think that the last time anyone looked at the theory of evolution, was 150 years ago? Sheesh. Scientists will even point out that Darwin got a few things wrong. The truth is, that every time a new method of testing, and investigation comes along, like the study of DNA, biologists start testing evolution in hopes of being the first one to discover some new fact that supports or weakens some aspect of evolutionary theory. Talk about a carrier maker, being the one to shake Darwin out of the cat bird seat.

And once again, we have veiled threats about hell. Some Christians seem to want us to go to hell if we're wrong. I mean some of them really want it.

Debbidy says:

We Christians have no connection with Hitler.....If you remember your history...We, Christians, have been killed for our beliefs. Would you die for yours....

This reference is the result of the creationist claim (and that of Cameron and Comfort) that Hitler had an “undeniable connection"to Darwin and Evolution. An atheist commented that,

“Christianity has an "undeniable connection" with Hitler, racism has an "undeniable connection" to Christian Fundamentalists, and Krk [sic] Cameron has an "undeniable connection" to willful ignorance.

The uncomfortable truth for Christians is that Germany was a Christian country. Members of the Wehrmacht wore buckles that said, “Gott mit uns ” (God with us) and there is no evidence that Hitler ever stopped believing in God. There is also no evidence that Hitler ever thought about evolution, much less accepted that his superior race evolved from apes and blacks that were the first examples of humans on earth.

But let us, for a moment, accept all the misinformation presented about Hitler and Darwin. The truth is that not one thing would be changed in the evolutionary theory. It is still factual science. That it might have been badly used (were the claims true) is irrelevant. After all, Christianity has been used badly by despots and killers for centuries, and that is history. That Christians were occasionally killed (mostly early on) for their beliefs does not make them right. Only dead.

Kathy says:

“...In his own words: Darwin confessed, "To suppose that the eye with all its inimitable contrivances for adjusting the focus to different distances, for admitting different amounts of light, and for the correction of spherical and chromatic aberration, could have been formed by natural selection, seems, I freely confess, absurd in the highest degree." Even Darwin thought his theory was faulty - and that's why it's just that - A theory and nothing more.”

I am going to give Katy the benefit of the doubt, and assume that she has never actually read Origin. If she had, she would know that Darwin follows that statement with several pages explaining just how the eye could have developed with evolution. Creationist leaders cherry pick Darwin's quotes the same way they often cherry pick quotes from the Bible. Out of context. Darwin did not think his theory was faulty,.

As to the ol' chestnut, “...and that's why it's just that - A theory and nothing more.”, Kathy continues to misunderstand science. A scientific theory is not “just” anything. The theory of evolution, has 150 years of science to back it up. Science from multiple disciplines and hundreds of thousands of tests and predictions. The mountain of evidence for evolutionary theory will not crumble to the likes of creationism. Theory in science is the best thing to be..

Wombat says:

Not even athiests [sic] believe what they babble about. They are just depressed disenchanted people who have to lash out at others because they do believe in a God. But you can't believe in a God can you? Because then you would'nt [sic] have anything to talk about. You'd be the totally uninteresting person at a party of people who all root for the Dodgers. Others believe in God, so you have to NOT believe in God. You are like a walking talking coffee table book, or a tattoo, or a cute dog on a leash you walk thru the park in hopes some girl will talk to you...constantly seeking something to make yourself interesting...because otherwise you are just a dimwitted angry person.

LOL...why do you think athiests [sic] run around babbling their nonsense and trying to get others to STOP believing? If an athiest [sic] really believed in what they say they do, they'd just stay quiet and laugh at us who do believe. Instead you have to fight about it with every breath you take.

Also, you might try realizing that being an athiest [sic] and showing some common courtesy and manners are not alien to each other. Maybe then you can post something one day which is not filled with hate, insults ...and a whole lot of clues to your immaturity.

Now...I will let you get back to scouring the internet for something to scream and rant about with your 5 year old mentality.

Wow. Just Wow. Now I will admit that Wombat was taunted by someone that called her/him a “F*cking hypocrite.”, wow. The turning the other cheek love just flows...not. Apparently, Wombat has trouble with the notion that an atheist can be an intelligent and thoughtful person. But for the record I'm not depressed or disenchanted; I'm did not become an atheist so I could be interesting; I am most definitely not a dimwitted angry person; and while I'm am vocal, there are several reasons and one of them speaks to why so many atheists are speaking out now. I know that Wombat and others would like for us to just stay quiet, but that isn't their choice. With folks trying to put creationism into the science classroom, and trying to make laws that reflect their Christian beliefs, rather than the broader social make up of the country, more and more atheists see the need to make sure that we are counted too.

And quite frankly, I'm tired of Christians telling me what I should think, do, or say as an atheist. As for “filled with hate, insults...”, etc... time to look in the mirror, Wombat.

Chris says:

“Kirk isn't shoving anything down anyone's throat, he is simply trying to give people a chance to decided for themselves what they believe. On college campuses across the U.S. and in public schools only one side is given to students.

Why can't both sides be presented and then give each student the FREEDOM to decided what they believe and don't believe?...I say let him hand out his book, let both sides be presented and give American's the freedom to decided for themselves.”

What isn't being pointed out by Chris is that Cameron does want creationism shoved down the throats of students by putting it in science classes, where it doesn't belong, but in the science class we don't teach opinion. If you mix the right two chemicals together, you get a chemical reaction. That isn't opinion or a matter for letting the student decide for themselves. Science is not democratic. Gravity exists, and if you want to believe otherwise, fine, but that we should teach the “controversy”, where someone might differ is foolish. Notice that we do not teach holocaust denialism in history classes. The holocaust occurred, and while we can present the evidence for it, we also say clearly, that 6 million Jews were killed. Period.

Evolution is a fact. It is the basis of modern biology and in a properly taught science class, the facts are presented, experiments performed and children (including collage students) are taught the basics of how to do science, and why things are they way they are. Creationism does not make predictions, has no facts to support it, and performs no experiments, so it is not science. There is no controversy, and no alternative of a scientific type to evolution.

Josh said:

“The point of the Hitler remark, the racism remark is plain to see. Evolution gives supporting rationale to racism because it is assumed that people will evolve in different ways and at different rates. You cannot embrace a theory such as evolution and insist that all people are equal, it is impossible by definition. If we simply rose from pond scum, if we are simply carbon sacks of water with electricity, we have no intrinsic value other than what power we hold and those with power deem us to have; Survival of the Fittest.”

Evolution does not give support to racism, and does not assume that “people will evolve in different ways and at different rates.” This is a perfect example of someone who doesn't have a clue what evolution is. If we (humans) continue to evolve, and that is a real possibility, it will be as a species, not as single individuals. That is how evolution works. On populations, not one person at a time.

I personally don't think we are “simply” carbon sacks of water with electricity, with no intrinsic value. We are social animals that got where we are together as a species, and we either survive as a species or we don't. Survival of the fittest refers to the species that can adapt to it's environment and thus survive where others might not. If we, as humans, can't adapt to changes in the world around us, we could be replaced, and it wouldn't have to be an intelligent species that replaces us in the niche we now fill.

The above examples are why atheists and scientists are so tired of people who speak about things they don't understand. It has always baffled me that so many Christians think the person to talk to about evolution is a preacher, or an actor who hasn't a single degree in the sciences. Which is why I would be the first one to say, don't take my word for it. Go to some of many web sites or blogs maintained by biologists and read what they have to say. Read books written by evolutionists and work to understand what they are saying and why.

And as for us atheists, we live right along side you, and have the same rights to speak out as you do. I refuse to apologize or shut up just because what I say bothers you.

The Backward Whale

Things keep turning up in the fossil world. Scientists have gone and dug up another transitional fossil for the whale, this one called the Maiacetus.

The oldest fossil is the Sinonyx, a wolf-sized critter. Then there is the Pakicetus (the oldest cetacean) followed by the Ambulocetus natans (the walking whale that swims). At about 46 to 47 million years ago the Rodhocetus lived, and this same time period is where the Maiacetus lived. Then the Basilosaurus and
the Dorudon left their marks.

All this information (minus the Maiacetus) is in an excellent article by Raymond Sutera called The Origin of Whales and the Power of Independent Evidence.

For Information on the Maiacetus check out The Backward Whale at The Loom blog, Fossil foetus shows that early whales gave birth on land at Not Exactly Rocket Science. And Maiacetus, the good mother whale at Laelaps. And lastly Amazing Fossil Finding: Proto Whales Gave Birth on Land, not at sea at Greg Laden's Blog.

For all information evolution, go to The TalkOrigins Archive.

The God Delusion

I just finished reading The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins. This is a nice read. Dawkins writes in a clear and straightforward manner, and presents a calm argument for rejecting belief in a god. He also presents the problems of religion and responds to arguments about the problems of atheism.

After reading The God Delusion, I have to admit to being baffled by the notion that he comes off as an "angry atheist". His tone to me was not angry. Firm, yes. Decisive, yes. Even argumentative at times, yes. But angry? (Madalyn Murry O'Hair was angry. By comparison, Richard is a pussy cat.) The only time I see anything remotely like anger is when he talks about children and religion, and here is argument is more about child abuse. He argues that children are not Christian, Jewish or Muslim (or any other religion for that matter) but children. Children are not Democrats, Republicans or Communists, but the children of
Democrats, Republicans or Communists.

He argues that children should be protected from the religious views of parents when those views threaten to harm the child. That he sees religion as a harm in the education of children, and in their mental development is something that he argues rather well. What the answer to this problem is, would be a worthwhile discussion for anyone.

That children are harmed and killed every year because of the beliefs of their parents put into action is something that can not be denied. Children who suffer painful deaths because mom and dad would rather
believe that prayer should save them, when a simple shot or two would save them should not be in that position. If that rankles people of faith, then so be it. Let us make sure that no ones religion can interfere in children getting proper medical attention. Even the parents of the children. If that kid decides to become a practicing bible thumper at 18 and wants to believe that prayer will cure rather than avail him/her self of proven medical care, then let them reap the rewards of their beliefs, but not before that.

I would highly recommend this book to anyone out there. It is a good introduction to atheism.